Hippy Affirmation Day 16

I can handle it.

I can handle it by Angela Star.One of the most helpful books that I have read is Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway by Susan Jeffers. I have found it to be so helpful that I have read it three times. She states that underneath all our fears is the basic fear that we cannot handle what we fear – whatever it may be. I remind myself of this truth when I start to let my fears overtake me.

Worry is a companion to fear. We often use worry as a way to prepare ourselves for the thing that we fear – to help us handle it. I was speaking to a friend of mine last week about this very same thing. Her dog had to be “put to sleep”. I remembered that she was worried about this eventuality because he was old and he had a persistent cough. She was worried that he might have a tumor.  Now that the thing she was worried about came to pass, I asked her what she has learned from worrying about it. She admitted that the worry was not helpful and that it did not prepare her for his death.

I have had to handle some pretty difficult things in my life. I have survived being beaten black and blue by a babysitter and her friends, sexual molestation by a male babysitter, relentless bullying as a child, an abusive marriage, fleeing to a shelter, a divorce, two car accidents that totaled the cars, job losses, suicide attempts, a complete physical and mental breakdown, and numerous short-term mental hospital stays. I’m not listing these instances to get pity or to dwell on the wrongs that have been done. My point is that I find that when I feel like I cannot handle my current difficulties it is best to remind myself that I have handled much worse before. If  I have weathered much worse, why can I not handle what is happening now? I surely can.

Feel The Fear and Do It Anyway

Click Here to order Feel The Fear and Do It Anyway By Susan Jeffers

Everyone has difficulties that they have been through. No one gets through this life unscathed. It’s part of the whole. The thing to remember is that we can handle it. Just hold on until handling it gets less difficult to do.

Posted in Daily Hippy Affirmation

Hippy Affirmation Day 15

I let go of past resentments.

I let go of past resentments by Angela Star.I have just woken up from having a dream about something in my past that I thought I was over. Apparently, I still hold some resentment inside of me. This situation happened so long ago that I should really be over it. I can’t imagine why part of me still holds onto the anger. In my 20s I worked as a waitress at a restaurant named Shells. At first it was a good job working with people who were fair. After a time, some ladies were hired that knew some of the ladies that worked there and knew each other. They formed a clique. And one of them became head server which gave her the responsibility of assigning the stations and tables that everyone would have to work in. She didn’t like me and she favored her friends.

These ladies took every opportunity to steal tables from other servers who weren’t their friends. That’s what the dream was about. I dreamt that a couple of them stole tables that I was supposed to wait on when I hesitated to get to them because I wasn’t quite sure if they were mine. I confronted one of them and told her that I knew exactly what she and her friends were doing. Then I threw down my checks and apron and quit.

In real time I never did quit because of being fed up with their behavior. I did tell the owners that the station and table assignments were not fair. They did not care. One of them even told me that I had the opportunity to be head waitress and that I turned it down so I didn’t have anything to complain about. I had good reason to turn the position down. I was going to college and I didn’t want any extra stress. In addition to stealing tables and assigning me poor stations they talked about me behind my back and put me down. The head server and some of them made outright demeaning comments to me. Now that I think about it, I should have quit.

I’m trying to understand why I did not look for another job then quit. I was a server for 10 years. Sometimes it was smooth and easy. Other times it was rocky and hard. Anyone who has ever been a waitress knows the hell I am talking about here (when the kitchen is running out of everything, you’re short staff, and the shift feels like it will never end). In addition to the stress that could be intense, I experienced cliques with their attitudes when I went on to work at other restaurants. In these restaurants they could not steal tables. But, they were nasty towards me. In one of the restaurants they were worse than the ladies at Shells Restaurant.

Why didn’t I quit waiting tables? I believe that low self-esteem and poor confidence in myself kept me in those jobs. I graduated from college with a BA yet I did not pursue a job in my field. I have no one to blame for the poor treatment but myself. I could have gotten out of those situations and applied myself. I have to let my anger toward all those people go and I have to let the anger toward myself go. I am hoping that making this statement will help me to let go. I also hope that stating this affirmation will help too. I am determined to look into other ways that I can let go of my resentments as well.

I know that I still have anger toward some people in personal relationships in my past. That is understandable, although, I do not want to hold onto those resentments either. The resentment that I still feel toward the ladies that I worked with at these restaurants surprises me. Having this dream is helpful because I am forced to examine where I am with all my resentments.

Do you have resentments toward people in your past? What will it take for you to let go of those resentments? Do you need to forgive yourself for putting up with poor treatment when you could have done something about it? I encourage you to think about this topic in depth because resentments only hurt you. The people in your past don’t give a s**t about what they did to you. Why should you?

 

Posted in Daily Hippy Affirmation

More On Affirmations

More On Affirmations

The white light of heaven shining through the dark clouds.

Since I wrote the article A Conversation on AffirmationsI have thought more on this subject and I feel that it is necessary to talk more about affirmations and their purpose. This is especially important since I have a series of hippy affirmations that I regularly post.

My introduction to affirmations came through reading the book, You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay. That was quite awhile ago (sometime in the late eighties). According to Louise Hay, any statement that we make is an affirmation. This includes every word we speak and every thought that we think. Doing affirmations is consciously choosing to make positive statements with the purpose of improving our life. We want to open up the channels in our own consciousness to create the effect that we want in our life.

You Can Heal Your Life book

Click Here to order You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Haye

If we walk around all day thinking and saying negative things that is the effect that we will cause. It’s a much better idea to make positive statements about what we want ourselves and our life to be. Our subconscious mind is aware of our thinking and will obey our directives. The book goes on to quote best-selling author Dr. Bernie Siegel, “affirmations are not a denial of the present, but a hope for the future. As you allow them to permeate your consciousness, they will become more and more believable until eventually they may become real to you.”

Affirmations are tricky. Upon first practice they do not seem believable or real. This is especially true if you are trying to affirm something that you do not already believe deep down inside of yourself. For example, people rarely love themselves completely. There is usually some judgement or criticism within. Some people are so hard on themselves that they cannot even imagine speaking an affirmation such as, “I am perfect just the way that I am.” I found this inability to be able to accept affirmations that I just didn’t believe yet to be a roadblock to practicing affirmations. I had to persist. I had to keep doing them. But, I also had to do other things to help myself get over that roadblock. I had to go to therapy, meditate and do things that gave me confidence.

I also needed to listen to people who saw me differently than I saw myself. My friends and associates kept telling me that I had many talents. They kept telling me that I was fun to be around and that they really liked me. Why should I not believe them if I was being genuinely myself when I was around them? I am fortunate that I don’t feel as uncomfortable now when I do affirmations that are positive about myself. I’ve grown. I’ve overcome a lot of feelings of not being good enough. I admit that I still have some feelings of not being good enough. I’m learning to how to deal with that and I hope to eventually overcome it.

Buddhists practice right thought (right mindfulness) and right speech. It is part of the basis of Buddhism – The Noble Eightfold Path to Enlightenment. This path also includes right view, right resolve, right conduct, right livelihood, right effort, and right “samadhi” (meditative absorption or union). Right thought (mindfulness) means never being unconscious in mind so that you are aware of the present and what you are doing at all times. Right speech means no lying, no rude speech, no telling one person what another says about him. Positive affirmation is essentially right thought and right speech. 

A positive affirmation needs to have right thought as a component. When we go unconscious with our thoughts we often think obsessively. This thinking trap takes us out of the present awareness. We are not practicing right mindfulness by it’s definition. A positive affirmation also needs to have right speech as a component. Which means that the words used are pure in intent and in no way meant to cause harm.

The Four Agreements book

Click Here to order The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz

Don Miguel Ruiz wrote a book called The Four Agreements. There are four agreements that we can make everyday that are life guidelines for conducting ourselves in a positive way. One of them is, “Be impeccable with your words.”

His recommendations for doing so are:

  1. Speak with integrity.
  2. Say only what you mean.
  3. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others.
  4. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.

To me, this is just another way of using right speech that Buddhism promotes and it falls in line with what I have been saying about doing positive affirmations. It is not essential to be a Buddhist to practice using affirmations. It’s also not necessary to follow the ideas of Don Miguel Ruiz. These are just extras that can help you deepen your understanding of speaking in the positive.

It’s interesting to me that this fundamental thinking about how we use our words is promoted in many different ways by many different people. It’s even inherent in The Ten Commandments with the commandment to not bear false witness against your neighbor. And to not take the Lord’s name in vain. These commandments do not include our speech to ourselves but they do illustrate the importance of right speech.

Beginning with monitoring our words that we use every day when we speak to others and to ourselves while adding the practice of affirmations we can go a long way in changing the course of how our life goes for the better.

 

Posted in Hippy Chic Articles

Hippy Affirmation Day 14

I dedicate to meditate.

I dedicate to meditate by Angela Star.One of the best things that my mother ever did for me was to have me trained in transcendental meditation (TM). I was very young at the time. I think she did it because I had severe allergies and she thought that meditation would help alleviate them. All that I remember about my training was that I walked around a table many times.

Over the course of my life I have practiced meditation off and on. Thanks to mom again, I retrained in TM when I was 18 years of age. About seven years ago I found out that my TM teacher was in the same city as I lived, Tampa. He gave me my mantra again and re-instructed me in the practice. For a time I was participating TM with other meditators at his center. I no longer live in that area or practice with other meditators.

I like to meditate best while soaking in a bathtub in the dark – sometimes with a candle burning. I only have a shower right now so that is not a possibility at this time. I know that I don’t need to meditate in a tub – that I can meditate anywhere. What happens when I begin to meditate is that thoughts crowd my brain. As I continue to meditate I am able to get to a place where the thoughts stop. In this place I experience a deep calm and peace like I have never known in any other situation in life. I see purple smoke that moves in swirls in the blackness of my vision. It is the best place I have ever known to exist. I often wonder why I don’t meditate regularly considering that I can be in such a wonderful place when I do meditate.

I know that the benefits of meditation are amazing. The following benefits are listed on the official transcendental meditation site (http://www.tm.org/benefits-of-meditation):

  1. greater inner calm throughout the day
  2. reduced cortisol (the “stress” hormone)
  3. normalized blood pressure
  4. reduced insomnia
  5. lower risk of heart attack and stroke
  6. reduced anxiety and depression
  7. improved brain function and memory

This is a list of only a small number of the wide range of benefits of meditation. I hope that this information has sparked your interest in meditation. I encourage you to give some kind of meditation a try. It doesn’t have to be transcendental meditation. Attempt to stick with it for awhile because it takes practice to train your brain to slow down and let the thoughts go. It can be frustrating but it is well worth the effort. Here are two things that I want to share that help me when I practice meditation. Do not meditate when you are tired. You’ll probably just fall asleep. Do not lay down to meditate. You’ll be almost guaranteed to go to sleep.

So, I am dedicating myself to practicing transcendental meditation every day for twenty minutes. That can’t be too hard to accomplish. All I have to do is give up some TV time. I watch more TV than I really need to watch anyway. I’ll bet that you can find a way to fit it into your life too.

Enjoy your meditation journeys as I plan to enjoy mine as well.

 

Posted in Daily Hippy Affirmation

Hippy Affirmation Day 13

Kindness is my motto.

Kindness is my motto by Angela Star.Kindness is ultimately the strongest force available to each of us. It is my motto for life. Where force causes pain kindness causes relief of pain. Kindness requires a softening. This softening can be a difficult thing to do. Yet it can be greatly rewarding.  I have discovered that when I feel unkind I am experiencing a hardening of my heart. In turn, if I am insightful enough, I can know that I am experiencing some anger that has fear as its basis.

Recently I read an excellent article in the magazine The Sun (July 2014 Issue 463 The One You’re With – Barbara Frederickson on Why We Should Rethink Love with Angela Winter as interviewer). The article was about positive resonance. Psychologist Barbara Fredrickson claims that “love blossoms virtually anytime two or more people…connect over a shared positive emotion.” This experience of shared positive emotion can be between partners, parents and children, or total strangers. It can be unlimited over the span of all our relationships.

I believe that this positive resonance – shared positive emotion – can only arise out of kindness. When I am unkind I am unable to be available for this experience. As I stated in the first paragraph, my unkindness usually arises out of fear. What is my fear? Do I feel threatened? Where does the threat originate? Does it relate to a deep fear that I have that comes from something that happened to me in the past?  Is the threat real or imagined? Questioning myself in this way can help me gain an insight that can help me to move past the fear and soften. There is much more to this idea of positive resonance. I encourage you to do your own research on the topic.

Once you have discovered how to soften yourself by removing blocks to acting in a loving way, I suggest that you also make some attempts to be kind. In our everyday lives, kindness can be given with just a smile to someone we pass on the street.  We could let the person behind us in line who has one grocery item go before us when we have a full cart of items. We could consider someone we know in need and ask them if there is anything we can do for them. There are many ways to be kind. Who knows?

Maybe your kindness may spread because the person you were kind to will be kind to someone else. Isn’t that a good reason to be kind?

Posted in Daily Hippy Affirmation

Hippy Affirmation Day 12

I can be spontaneous.

I can be spontaneous by Angela Star.Last Saturday after the Holiday Ball at Downtown Dance Studio (the dance studio that we go to) I noticed The Book Rack nearby. This is an establishment with the same name and is in the same place as the bookstore that used to be there. I was curious. I wanted to check it out. I wasn’t sure if my boyfriend would go for it. I took a chance and asked him to check it out with me.

He was interested. This new Book Rack is a place that stocks just about any kind of craft beer that you’ve ever heard of and lots that you may have not heard of. There was contemporary swing music playing. They had board games to play. No one was in there except for the girl employee who was reading a book. It didn’t seem like a happening place. Yet, something inside of me felt like it could be a fun experience to hang out there.

I picked out my favorite game (Scrabble). Then, it occurred to me that it would be more fun to play with three rather than two. Plus, I thought that she might enjoy participating too. Someone I knew from the local playhouse mosied on in for a spell. He wore a Dave Chapelle t-shirt and we had a humorous conversation about whether he looked like Dave Chapelle or not. He said that the game was stressing him out. We all laughed because he wasn’t even playing the game. We had such a fun time. By the way, I lost the game. Seems to be how it goes lately.

It’s spontaneous experiences like this one that I really enjoy. I look back and remember that time with fondness. And, I am encouraged to incorporate more of them into my life as I remember these kinds of times.

Have you passed up some experiences in your life that required spontaneity? Take a chance on spontaneity some time. It could be a whole lot of fun.

P.S. If you are wondering why I used a turtle for my image, here’s why. Turtles seem to be anything but spontaneous because they move slow. I didn’t use this image because of that reason. Like many images of this type, I just happen to come across the subject and I take the picture. To me this illustrates spontaneity beautifully because when I take these types of pictures I am being spontaneous by taking advantage of the moment to really see what is around me.

Posted in Daily Hippy Affirmation

Hippy Affirmation Day 11

I let go of old habits.

I let go of old habits by Angela Star.Have you ever heard the expression, “Old habits die hard.”? Old habits are leftovers from the past. Many of them keep us from moving forward in the future. We tend to live our lives on automatic pilot doing pretty much the same things over and over again even when they don’t serve our best interest.

Some people find this comforting and are perfectly okay with living in this manner. But, how common is it for most people to reach the end of their days on this Earth wishing that they had tried to do some things differently – wishing that they had tried to do more things that changed their experience of life?

I for one, want to be one of those people who stretched myself in some ways so that I experienced life more fully. For many of us there are limits to what we can do because of financial constraints (unless you are rich). Has anyone ever noticed that in the movie “The Bucket List” Jack Nicholson was rich so he and Danny Glover had the means to achieve the items on their bucket list? Did you also notice that it wasn’t so much the experiences that required money that were the most important ones to experience in the movie?

I am speaking of Jack Nicholson reconciling with his daughter and Danny Glover going home to his worried wife. Yes, I am advising you to do the out of the ordinary like bungee jumping if that is your thing. Or take a class that you have always wanted to do. I am also advising you to make the bold leap to do things in your personal life that you thought were too difficult to attempt. In doing these things we grow. To me that is life.

Letting go of old habits that do not serve us give us life. Life does not last. But, living life can be so fulfilling that each day feels like a lifetime of experience. I want my days to be as such.

Is there something you have been wanting to do that you hold yourself back from doing? Do you want to take the initiative to check out that coffee house that just opened in your town? Do you want to do something adventurous like visiting a state you have always wanted to see? Do you want to reconcile with someone but the idea of it seems too difficult to even consider?

I invite you to think about these questions and determine if old habits keep you from moving forward. If they are and you want to break free of them, perhaps it is time to make an attempt to do so.

Posted in Daily Hippy Affirmation

Hippy Affirmation Day 10

I exercise because
I like it.

I exercise because I like it by Angela Star.I’d like to say that this affirmation is absolutely true for me but it most definitely is not. I dislike it. I dislike it a lot. Traditional exercise feels like a real pain in the butt. I find myself so bored that I can’t motivate myself to do it. When I do motivate myself to do it, I don’t stick with it. Just about the only activity that can be considered exercise that I will stick to is dancing. I take ballroom dance lessons regularly and go to dances. From looking at the dance image it is evident that I enjoy dancing and I am quite happy to dance. Unfortunately, I can’t afford to go enough for it to give me enough benefit to be at my optimal health.

Recently, I discovered a video on YouTube by Ben Aaron who is a reporter. He did a humorous segment on dance walkingAs I watched the video I thought to myself, “That looks like fun.” Later on I found myself thinking that I would love to dance walk with a group of people. I tend to stick to activity that requires me to do it with a group or in a class. This has lead me to decide to start a dance walking group.

I had my first group meeting last week. No one showed up. I still did it and had fun. People in the park seemed to enjoy seeing me do it but no one seemed interested in joining me in the activity. I wanted to ask some of them to join in. I didn’t because I felt like I would have been interfering in their time and the purpose that they had when they came to the park. I’m hoping some people will show up to participate this week. We’ll see.

I’m still going to dance walk by myself. I really think this is the thing that will get me motivated to “work out” and “keep in shape” because it combines two things that I love (music and dance). I’ve got Just Dance for the Wii as well. Plan to do that too. I’m hoping that with repeated practice I will be able to in the future say, “I Exercise Because I Like It” with absolute belief that I mean what I say.

Are you unmotivated to exercise? What do you think will change that for you? Perhaps there is something you like to do that can be exercise that doesn’t feel tedious to you.

Posted in Daily Hippy Affirmation

Jasper Chip & Octagon Bead Necklace With Shield Pendant

Jasper Chip and Octagon Bead Necklace with Shield Pendant by Angela Star

Jasper Chip and Octagon Bead Necklace with Shield Pendant

Alleviate stress and reconnect
with Earth’s grounding
energy with red jasper.

Made of red jasper chips, red jasper octagonal beads, spiral oval beads and bronze seed beads with a silvertone shield medallion pendant. Necklace measures 21″ in length. Pendant is 1 1/4″ in length and 1 1/4″ in width. Earrings are 1 1/2″ in length and 3/4″ in width.

An original one-of-a-kind necklace and earring set hand-crafted by artisan Angela Star.

$39.99
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Posted in Hippy Chic Necklace and Earring Sets

Red & Gold Lampwork Glass Bead Murano Pendant Set

Red and Gold Lampwork Glass Bead Murano Pendant Necklace and Earring Set by Angela Star

Red and Gold Lampwork Glass Bead Murano Pendant Necklace and Earring Set

Beautifully coordinated variant shapes of lampwork beads and dichoric glass pendant.

Sometimes you just have to make something that is not so matchy matchy that becomes something funky. This set has elements that match as far as color goes and that it is made of glass beads and a glass pendant. But, it does go askew a bit with beads that have various shapes and style. Yet, it works and works well.

Necklace is made of various lampwork gold and red beads, red and gold e beads, gold crackle beads and a lovely red and gold leaf-shaped dichoric glass pendant. It measures 22″ in length with a pendant that is 2 1/2″ in length and 1 1/4″ in width. Total length with pendant is 24 1/2″. Earrings that are also made of lampwork glass beads, gold crackle beads and gold e beads measure 2″ in length and 1/4″ in width.

An original one-of-a-kind necklace and earring set hand-crafted by artisan Angela Star.

$39.99
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Posted in Hippy Chic Necklace and Earring Sets