I am learning the art of compromise.
I am very proud of myself. I am giving myself kudos because yesterday I noticed that my boyfriend seemed unsettled about something we were going to do. Not only did I notice but I addressed it in a very non-confrontational manner. Then, I was willing to compromise to resolve the situation in a way that was good for both of us (and our kitty).
Basically, I wanted to be able to sit out on the patio in peace. Our kitty, Shiva, can’t stand to be ignored and left out. Plus she wants to be outside. I keep her inside to keep her safe. When I try to sit out on the patio by myself she sits by the window making the most annoying meow. She won’t give up either. I proposed that we screen in the patio to solve the problem. He thought it out and decided on a cost-effective way to screen it in.
While we were on our way to Home Depot to buy the materials he was quiet and thoughtful. I sensed that he might not want to screen in the patio even though he did not say so directly. I brought it up and I was right. We talked it out and came up with a much cheaper solution that is just fine. We went to Petco to buy a harness and a leash. The picture above shows Shiva in her harness on the patio. I’ve put her in a harness and leash before but the harness was too big and she wiggled right out of it. This one did the trick. Problem solved, sort of. She doesn’t like not being able to roam. Poor kitty. She’ll be all right.
The reason why I feel so proud is that there was a time in the past that I did not pick up on my partner’s unease until it became an issue. In that past, I was also afraid to speak up. I have come a long way in my growth in self-esteem in this area. I admit that being with someone who I feel like I can be more honest with also helps. I was able to compromise and it wasn’t bad at all. I feel good about it.